Cheese With Your Whine?
1.18.2006
Son of a BITCH!!The last 12 hours of my life went something like this:
1. Use car headlights in garage (b/c light is out) to see to break down moving boxes.
2. Put Rylee down for bed.
3. Go back outside to move car to change light bulb.
4. Find out car won't start.
5. Email boss and tell her I will be late.
6. Get to bed late b/c of "Sweet Cherry Pie"
7. Experience one of the joys of cosleeping - a child puking TWICE in my bed.
8. Get up this morning, take a shower with Rylee.
9. Dress.
10. Go to garage to use friend's car that's parked there to go to Wal-mart.
11. Experience the joy of trying to stuff a huge carseat into the back of an itty-bitty car.
12. Drive to Wal-mart.
13. Buy jumper cables and go home.
14. Jump car and in the process get shit all over my pants and have to change my clothes.
15. Lug carseat out of afore mentioned small car and transfer back to my car.
16. Look down and discover that I'm OUT of gas.
17. Curse because gas stations don't take temp checks and I don't have new debit card yet.
18. Silently thank the MILF for giving me a Wal-mart gift card so that I can fill up.
19. Drive BACK to Wal-mart, get gas.
20. Drop Rylee off.
21. Remember that I forgot to leave her butt cream for diaper rash.
22. Turn around go back and drop it off.
23. Cross the Lake Worth Bridge and discover flashing lights behind me.
24. Try to beg my way out of a ticket.
25. Sign the fucking ticket and drive to work.
There is not enough Lexapro in the whole damn world for this shit. That is ticket number 2 in a month. If only I could have shown him some boob. Damn sweater.
Note to self: Get off the gas, stupid!
