8.26.2005
Simple MathToday I had to make the lovely trip to the gyno. I'll spare you the details why. I left work at 11:00, knowing that I had an appointment at 11:45. I got in my POS car and my tank is empty. I vaguely remembered this from this morning on the way to work, but of course had forgotten by the time I had to go. There is a gas station right on the way to the turnpike, so I pulled in, and ran in to give the cashier 5 bucks, since I knew I didn't have time to wait for a whole tank. Again, I'll spare you the drama of why I don't have a check card at the moment. In a huge hurry, I grab the nozzle all the way to the right - the one that's supposed to be the cheap gas and I cannot for the life of me get the damn nozzle to fit into my tank. Frustrated because I'm already running late, I held it as far in there as I could and pulled the trigger on the nozzle. A small amount drizzles in while most of it spews out. Now, incredibly angry and way beyond frustrated, I decide to try to ease it in there and gently pull back on the nozzle, even though there is no way that that thing is actually going to fit into the tank. This worked great for a few minutes, until the pump shut off....at $1.50, which of course is equal to less than a gallon right now.
By this point I was ready to go postal, so I go marching my skirted self in heeled sandals back into the station and rudely remark to the cashier that there is something wrong with the pump. This is our conversation:
Me: "That pump is not working. It just shut off. I've got to get gas because I'm going to be late for an appointment."
Cashier: "I reset the pump. You were trying to put diesel in your car."
Me: "No, I wasn't. I pulled the nozzle for the 87 octane gas like I always do."
Cashier: "Ma'am, the green nozzle is always diesel."
Me: "I guess I'll go try again. The pump is ready?"
Cashier: "Yes, I told you I reset it."
Angry, and knowing that of course I was right and wouldn't do anything THAT stupid, I hightail it out of there to go put that same nozzle in my car. Well of course I was wrong as the night is black. I hate that.
But now what? Do I put gasoline in on top of the diesel? Do I have to siphon that stuff out before I add it? Will my car spontaneously combust on the freeway if I mix fuels?
To hell with it. I'm late. I added the rest of my 5 bucks to the tank and drove off with $1.50 in diesel and $3.50 in gasoline in my car, feeling like a dumbass for being rude AND wrong. You should only be allowed to be one of those things. Rude OR wrong. Not both.
This ...
Breakfast
Plus this.....
Equals this.....
Yes those are actually my legs. Imagine my horror when after work I was sitting on the floor, minding my own business taking pictures of my girl and those things show up on my camera's screen. They're MINE!!!!! Holy moly! Is that a dimple in my CALF??? I have never seen that before!!! WTF??Perhaps these....
Plus this....
Could possibly equal this....
Now don't get me wrong.... I'm not disillusioned about how great I used to look. I know I wasn't a bombshell. And I know and am comfortable with the fact that I'm ordinary, not a standout either way (i.e., not dropdead gorgeous or mud fencepost ugly, kwim?). But for crying out loud, I'm at least 40 pounds heavier than I've ever been and my butt shakes when I walk. Ever heard of back fat? I've got some you can look at if you don't have your own. And a pooch? Yep, I've got one of those too.
I'd like to blame it all on this.....
But sixteen months after the fact, this is all me. I am committing right here in cyberspace for all to read to exercising and eating better. I used to be able to eat whatever I wanted to and it didn't really matter. Apparently, now it's not the same, and I'm a slow learner. I swear, though, if the eating right and excercising plan doesn't work, I'm moving on to the cabbage diet!
NO MORE MATH!
I had a really great afternoon with my punkin today. We came home and played after I picked her up early from school. She had a good day there....no bites, thank God! And we finally got a picture I've wanted forever. I took it, so it's not great, and if you're offended by nursing pictures, stop reading, but I thought I'd share it. I'd really like to do a nursing photo shoot, just to capture the whole experience, since she's getting bigger and just doesn't nurse as often, but I thought this one was cute. Warning: Boob picture ahead! LOL!
